Thank you for replies. I believe I posted those very personal lines from my lifestory not to pity myself or get advice, but to be part of those many who express emotions experienced the hard way on this sympathetic and well moderated site.Such an opportunity did not exist 20 years ago.Neither was 10% of the population swiping on Tinder then.
I told I only felt understood once when existing in the depth but now remember that also our local postman unexpected recommended me to see a particular GP. I never have had therapy or been on medication, but following his advice I booked an appointment with this old doctor whos name I now recall.Entering his surgery was a time travel back, furnished with furniture from the 19th century.He understood and with a few kind words prescribed me a benzodiazepine that gave temporary relief for a couple of weeks.I was too embarrassed to visit again asking for a new prescription, so I only met him this one time.
So my topic was created not that much for discussion, but mostly just to say hi to all 🙂