I think you’ve actually described what i have been feeling lately. The way these arranged marriages work – in my community atleast – is so detached from the individual and their identity.

It is actually funny. My mom the other day was talking about how things have changed now and i don’t have to be terrified – and by that she means if i have proof after getting engaged that the guy is completely horrible – i can break it off 🙂

And it is really cool that you could see the problem with this. When i had gone to drop my mom at her mom’s place, my aunt was there and she was telling us about how one of her husband’s relative went to the US for his education, fell in love and got married to a foreigner there and she said “the times are bad now”. I think it is kind of ingrained in all of us that if we stray from the “way” to do things it is unthinkable and wrong.

I guess because no one was understanding what i was saying here I thought i was either too selfish or too sensitive. Thank you for hearing me out, again.  I will not bend to the rules – this may actually have sounded dramatic 🙂 I was just doubting myself that I don’t know enough about life to decide what the right thing for me is.