Dear Girija:

You are not dead yet. And you are not a plant. It only feels to  you that you are these things. I can’t argue with how you feel, of course. I respect your feelings for what they are and will not suggest that you feel any different than you feel now. What I am saying is that you are alive and you are not a plant, of that  I am sure.

Here is the problem as I see it: you can’t feel alive for as long as you are in the nest where you are. And you can’t leave that nest for as long as you don’t feel alive. If you felt alive, you could leave, but you don’t, so there is nothing pushing you to leave that nest.

I suppose you are more like those “living  dead” in the zombie, science fiction movies. I remember a scene from one of those movies- a doctor of some kind holding food in front of a zombie, the zombie moving toward the food and the doctor said: the zombie doesn’t have a digestive system to digest this food, but he still has the desire for the food.

You, Girija, still have a desire, this is why you are suffering. Get in touch with your desire. Tell me a bit about it.

anita