“-who was it that betrayed your trust and is it the same person or persons who criticized you a whole lot?”

It was my mother who betrayed my trust. She only did that once (since I never let her do it again – I was 5/6 by the time) and it was seemingly trivial, but apparently enough for me to emotionally distance myself from other people and never trust them again.

As for the criticism, it is myself who does that… I think I am doing it in response to betrayed trust. The implication of my mother rejecting me when I needed her support was developing a conviction  that I am a bad person, not worthy of even my mother’s love and support, and being bad person is sth I as a child (and kind of still) was very concerned about.

I am supposed to be an M.D when I finish my studies, huge majority of people consider me smart,good person with big potential, there is a lot of approval nowadays, but I don’t seem to care at all, because since childhood I’ve always considered myself worthless. I acknowledge it is all in my head now, but I dont know if and how I can deal with that… ;(

Thank you very much for your response! <3

Forgive me if there are many errors, I am not a native speaker 🙂

• This reply was modified 5 years, 7 months ago by James.