Dear V:

I am back earlier than I intended. I read the conversation you detailed. In the conversation you detailed you are harassing him, really. You are being unfair to him.  He didn’t do anything wrong or rude when in the company of your friends. He asked them a few questions and they didn’t respond much to him, and he didn’t insist on asking them yet more questions, open ended or not. (D:.. they didn’t engage with me either, V: You’re right).

When he told you: “I feel like you’ve been on me for everything, and you’re bashing me”, reads like he is accurate.

You told him: “I know that you’re a great person, and I would like for everyone else to see it as well”- this is condescending to him, presenting him as inferior to your friend, for why is it that you don’t want your friends to show your boyfriend what great people they are by engaging with him more?

You told him: “I am feeling very disconnected”, giving him the responsibility for you feeling disconnected. But he is not responsible for it, he is just the way he was before. You don’t feel disconnected because he is not more outgoing than he is.  I think you feel disconnected because (if I remember correctly, first page) because marriage came up and you got scared and started thinking a lot about your ex boyfriend.

Isn’t it true that you feel disconnected from your boyfriend because marriage was brought up and you’ve been thinking about your ex boyfriend?

anita