Dear NeedAChange:

That your mother yelled at you frequently- that is a fact (you stated so). Whether she yelled at you when you threw up or pooped, these are possibilities that I brought up, not facts. If you ask your mother, she may say she didn’t yell at you in those particular occasions because either she didn’t, or she doesn’t remember very well. For example, she may have yelled at you at one time when you threw up, but didn’t the second and third time, and she may remember only the second and third times.

It is also possible that she would lie, not wanting to remind you of something you forgot.

“I can definitely see how my mother’s yelling would have kept me on edge and scared as a child… I still am at a loss for how I can begin to  improve myself for the better”-

1. If your mother is still yelling at you, or at anyone else while you are present- there is something you will need to do so “to improve myself for the better” -let me know.

2. If anyone yells at you at times, same thing- let me know.

3. Understand that your mother’s yelling (even if it is in the past), is still keeping you “on edge and scared”. Your brain was formed as a child with her yelling in it. It will take you being mindful, meaning, hearing her yelling that is still going on, in your brain, reactivated. And then hushing that yelling. This mindful kind of work requires time, patience and a whole lot of persistent practice.

I will wait for your response to this post.

anita