No, I definitely have Asperger’s, I have been diagnosed. It’s definitely something you are born with, but yes, different circumstances could help in bringing to light the issues a person with the disorder has. When I was diagnosed at 21 years old, I had so many ‘aha!’ moments of why I work and behave differently that the syndrome explained in great detail. Like puzzle pieces finally falling into place.

Maybe the one of the reasons why I peeked is because I felt that my mom was distant when I was little, but I’m not certain I think that would help me if I decide to talk things through with my mom, blaming her. I have to somehow own up to what I did, I think. My dream scenarios have always been to be able to either stop thinking about these things over time and working on my self-esteem (which doesn’t seem to be working), or talking openly and honestly about all this with my mother.

That’s at least my thoughts as of this moment.