Dear Javairia:

The process of not feeling guilty for what I am not guilty is  about telling myself the truth, that I am not responsible for what I am not responsible for, and believing it, believing what is true.. to be true.

In your case, it would be you telling yourself:

1. I was not responsible for having been sexually assaulted when you were 6 or 7, the man who assaulted me was responsible, not me!- and believing it to be true.

2. I did not have any kind of sexual activity with my elder brother. My mother was wrong when she accused me of that!- and believing it to be true.

You wrote: “since  I’ve been talking with that guy regularly, I’ve been self-harming more than ever before”- I didn’t know that. But you have to stop talking to him immediately!

Do you want to tell me more about the connection between talking to him and self harming (and how do you self harm?)

anita