Dear flavia:

Yes, I think that I may have had a similar experience to yours, but I think that I felt worse than you do about your mother (I may be wrong):  I had an excruciatingly troubling relationship with my mother. I suffered intense and prolonged guilt in regard to her, and fear, for decades. I finally ended all contact with her, it’s been seven years.

It was not easy to end contact and keep it in the past, but it was my only shot at experiencing sanity.

anita