Dear Lothar:

If I understand correctly, you met whom you refer to as your first love 34 years ago, when you were 17. She ended the relationship a few years later during her first year at university. You married a different woman when you were 26, and have been “a very happily married.. person” for 25 years. Your first love is married as well.

Recently, your first love popped into your head as you are longing for “a lost friendship, a  missed opportunity”. You sent her two messages, trying to reconnect, and she didn’t answer you. You feel “both rejected and like I have made a huge mistake”-

– I would like to understand better, therefore I ask: why do you think sending her the messages was a mistake, and why might it have been a huge mistake?

anita