Dear Sofioula:

You shared that you and your parents do want the same things for you: “a stable job, get married and have kids”, but it’s the ways that they express to you what they want, that is keeping you up at night. Their ways are: (1)”to get stressed about it”, (2) to be critical of your mistakes, or alleged mistakes, (3)  to guilt trip you.

Clearly, their ways are keeping you away from getting what you want in life. I wish they changed their ways. I wish you become able, sometime in the future, to no longer follow their ways by getting stressed, being critical of your mistakes, or alleged mistakes, and guilt- tripping yourself (1-3).

“I have a morbid fear of mistakes. They can never be reversed in my dad’s head and so in my head”- what if you could get your dad’s head out of your head, so to speak. In other words, what if you could one day,  form your own, independently- chosen attitude about mistakes.

anita