Dear Janet:

You are welcome. The emotion you mentioned in the title of your thread is shame. It is now clear to me that the emotion behind you never having been in a relationship is fear. You are and have been too afraid of being in a relationship, therefore.. you were never in one, and you are not likely to be in one for as long as you are too afraid.

If you want to, we can look more into your fear. Before we discuss, if we will, the news stories you mentioned as a source of your relationship fear, let’s look closer- let’s look at your fear of your father. You wrote earlier: “I was afraid of him for most of my childhood and teenage years”- will you elaborate on this sentence, more than you did before?

anita