Dear C. R. Smith:

You are very welcome.

“There is no denying that experiencing the beauty of nature makes one’s life better. BUT it is the internal experience while in the presence of beauty which really matters” – perfectly said!

“If aspects of your life really are not great. Or say an essential need is not being met (and maybe having access to beautiful places IS an essential need), should one still just BE and stop TRYING to CHANGE THINGS or  should one seek a change?”- like you wrote above, “it is the internal experience while in the presence of beauty which really matters”. If your subjective, internal experience is ugly, then an objective, external beauty will be lost on you. In that case, it doesn’t make sense to keep moving, hoping that a new external beauty will undo the inner experience. On the other hand, if you live in a place that is too noisy, too polluted, smelly, etc., then moving is of course the right thing to do!

“My loneliness: That was really just an aside, but it definitely is making my life less fulfilling and rewarding. I also feel shame about it. I appreciate you saying you want to try to connect with me. I feel a connection, even though it’s virtual“- We have connected then. I wonder what the shame is about (?)

“I spent the first 35 years of my life deeply enmeshed in a religion which gave me immense meaning and security.. Losing the religion stripped me of  my security and sense of meaning”– it reads like your first 35 years were immensely wonderful.. but then you shared in 2014 that what motivated you to become a counselor was “a desire to understand and heal (yourself)”, suggesting that you were emotionally injured or unwell, needing healing. I wonder if the emotional injury suggested occurred after you left the religion at 35?

“Being a mother gave me meaning (although I was very depressed then, too)“- you were very depressed when you were a mother younger than 35.. while still in the religion?

“I am definitely NOT 60% okay with my job. I keep my job because it pays quite well, I work from home, and my hours are completely flexible…. I am living a lie to do my job… it is a lie“- can you give me a definition of the lie you are referring to in regard to your current job, a definition that is as simple and as clear as possible?

anita