Sorry for delayed response. It’s been a busy week and a half.

I hear you and agree with you and I am looking within. I am looking\learning to love myself. I am working on myself. I am spending time with people who care about me. I am learning to love my self with “radical self acceptance” while still trying to change things that are hurting me. I am doing many things right, some things wrong, but I am applying the dichotomy of control to my life. I try to change what I can, let go of what I cannot. The problem is that I am more alone than ever and all the wise words and suggestions are leaving more alone and in pain. I can’t find the words that could accurately describe what I am feeling. I am all alone and it’s only getting worse. It’s a perfect storm and my only reaction (internally) is sadness and tears. But on the outside I am working hard and doing what must be done. I spend a few weeks on dating sites and OMG, I feel sorry for young men in US. They don’t stand a chance. I’ll leave the rest to your interpretation and imagination because anything I say after this will look like straight up misogyny. No, I don’t think women are bad. My mom, grandma, sister are good and faithful women. I also know that modern feminism is pure evil and not a single human being on this world or any other world could ever tell me otherwise. And no, my view of modern women has nothing to do with my bad luck, which is what someone would say to me. I don’t choose those type of women. The problem is that the good ones are either already taken or are being pursued by 10 guys or more. It’s a fact that I read which is pretty common knowledge: 80% of women are looking for 20% (10% in actuality) of men.