Dear caroline1234:

You are very welcome

“But somehow one fear replaces another“- it is fear that is behind obsessions, and if one obsession replaces another, maybe you suffer from OCD and (if you haven’t so far) seeing a medical doctor is a good idea..? I was diagnosed myself with OCD many years ago, but no longer suffer from the symptoms (obsessions and compulsions)

“Now I’m so afraid, that someday I’m having children and that they are just like me. That they have to struggle with lying as well“- lying is not genetic, it’s not passed on from parent to child. It is a learned behavior, not a hereditary/ innate behavior.

“I hope so much that I can prevent that by helping them to build a healthy self-confidence“- that is always a good idea, to help your children build a healthy self-confidence, (and to not destroy much of the  confidence they naturally have as young children, as many parents do, unfortunately).

“but than I think about that my parents are SUCH AMAZING people and still I turned out that way“- reads to me that you turned out to be a good person who cares about helping her future children to build a healthy self-confidence, a good person who cares about not lying to people, a good person who wants to be good to her boyfriend.. all good things.

If you do want to figure out what about your earlier childhood brought about the lying, we can talk about it, look for how it happened- if you want to do so, let me know.

anita