Dear ABHILASH:

“I am not surprised that “an individual quarters, isolated and serene, amidst a coffee plantation atop a hill” turned out to be a lonely place for you:

(1) “The problem was that I was alone“- people are social animals, we cannot be okay alone for too long, (2) “a very toxic work culture“- means that the social interactions you do have with people while working are negative. We need positive social interactions with other people- not negative, or toxic.

“After my work hours… There was no one to talk to, nowhere to release my stress“- like any social animal, positive social interactions reduce stress and no interactions or.. negative interactions increase stress.

“I feel soul less. Nothing interests me“- positive social interactions infuse us with the feeling of being alive (a feeling that calms us in a joyful way); lack of such makes us feel dead (a feeling that distresses us).

“So each night I indulge in porn… because at least for that time, I feel relaxed, and not stressed“- you want that feeling of being alive.. we need to feel alive somehow!

“the moment I face a tiny bit of stress, I again get sucked back into porn. I have tried writing stories which have helped quite a bit, but not that much“- is there not a single person with whom you can positively interact after work, in-person?

anita