Dear TeaK,

Everything that is written is very true and I agree.

Yesterday we had a big fight I could name it about this and he openly told me that his ex is still an option in the future because everything would be easier (they can be together without hurting someone else). But that freaks me out because now he seems very selfish : in order not to hurt two friends he will hurt me. Which is devastating and I started not believing anything he says. Something always felt wrong because his words don’t match his deeds and that is my intuitive feeling. After all I gave up yesterday because I saw his true colors and I knew that something was very fishy. I don’t feel that it would be possible to stay friends after this. Maybe if we broke it off months ago yes, but now it seems like I saw all the layers that he had been hiding.

And there comes another problem when one is solved… My ex came back. I trust my intiution very well because I can feel and know when and where he will come back. And that happened two times already. He had written me on a app we are still friends in september then october and two days before I saw the messages. We were texting each other the whole day, how are you, what’s new, nothing very special and I’ve realised something.

I have very serious codependency/emotional attachment issues. I believe so, because when my other ex texted me I didn’t feel bad or hurt by the conversation with “my friend”. I was able to be rude and not to care, because I now have attention of someone else. I’ve noticed this problem when my ex stopped texting today. I don’t know what is the reason but I’ve started feeling anxious, stressed again. I have this psychosomatic problem with my stomach and I have stomach acid when I think of things like this. I still don’t know how to solve it. Anyways I am scared and I don’t like to be like this. Attached to people. I want to be okay to accept and let people go and not to feel this level od anxiety. I really want to be independent.