Dear Isabel:

You are welcome.  “I just have let myself down and gone against my moral compass“- there will be a time when your daughter will let herself (and you) down. I know that such time will come because we all let ourselves down from time to time, to one extent or another. And when that happens and your daughter feels badly about it, suffering for it, I am sure that you would not want her to forever-suffer over it. You would want her to feel badly for just the length of time it will take to learn from her experience, and make better choices as a result, am I correct?

“The only way I can justify it is that I need it at the time, but then I just feel selfish“- you are not a saint, Isabel, no one is. Learn from the experience, make better choices as a result and allow yourself to no longer suffer over it. Suffering further will only hurt you and your family. It is okay to let go of the guilt when it served its purpose.

anita