Dear Melissa:

You are welcome. You shared in your two posts: “My daughter developed anxiety and then depression after the pandemic started… She was developing normally until the pandemic and now she just seems to regress…won’t drive, has trouble staying at school all day…. My daughter did sign up to volunteer for a pet shelter without my even mentioning it much and seems excited about that. She feels very bad at school though…a constant feeling of dread. When she is home, she feels safe… Some of her stated fears are odd and it worries me“.

ncbi. nlm. nih. gov has an online summary of a study titled Increases in depression and anxiety symptoms in adolescence and young adults during the COVID-19 pandemic. Under Results, it reads: “Across participants and independent of age, there were increased generalized anxiety and social anxiety symptoms. In females, there were also increased depression and panic/somatic symptoms… Greater COVID-19 home confinement concerns were uniquely associated with increased generalized anxiety symptoms, and decreased social anxiety symptoms, respectively”-

-if I understand correctly, part of what it says is that adolescent anxiety shot up because of the pandemic. Home confinement following school and general shutdown provided adolescents with a relief from the heightened anxiety. They got used to that relief, adjusting and settling into a relatively comfortable home confinement life. Because of this adjustment, leaving home and returning to school became an anxiety elevating experience, which did not exist before the pandemic and the shutdown.

You mentioned School Shooting as a possible factor in her anxiety. I wonder if the following may be factors as well: (1) Bulling by peers in school, onsite and/ or on social media may be a factor, and (2) Interpersonal struggles, such as a close friendship ending, or relationship drama so typical in adolescent girls.

“I also am focusing on doing things with my son as he has felt bad watching her suffer. He is into doing a lot of activities and seems to enjoy them, but I can see he may have inherited my tendency to be too’ type A’“- I am curious to know (1) if by having a Type A personality, your daily stress level is up, and (2) how this personality affected and affects your parenting of both your children. I am not entitled to an answer of course but would be interested to read (and respond) if you are willing to share.

anita

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