Dear Lily Margarette:

“I came from a very loving, supportive family. Not perfect, but no family is… most people have these issues in a relationship. Everyone argues” – as children and onward, we tend see our parents and our childhoods in the best positive light, turning our attention away from the negative, and focusing on the positive. Children do this automatically, so to feel safer. When grown up, this selective view continues.

You moved your attention away from the issues and arguments at home; fast forward, you moved your attention away from the red flags (issues and arguments) in regard to your then boyfriend and his family?

anita