Thank you Anita! I think this was a great way to test how much I’ve grown. A year ago, I would have kept arguing with her and list out all the proof that goes against things she said to me or accused me of, but I was able to walk away calmly from the conversation without feeling like I needed to do that. That’s honestly a big step for me.

My parents, especially my dad, have always been hard workers. They tried their best from a young age to raise my sisters and I to be independent and not have to rely on anyone to help us through life. My dad was the more strict parent and would come down hard on us anytime we didn’t do great in school or were experiencing social problems. His initial reaction/comment anytime I tried to talk to him about something that happened, he would always start with “what did you do/say to them to make them do that to you?” So I always felt like I was the reason for everything that goes wrong. I would feel guilty about all of it so I would apologize for things even beyond my control and that I know I wasn’t responsible for. My boyfriend didn’t sleep well or is having a bad work day? I would always tell him I’m sorry and he always responds “why are you sorry? It’s not your fault nor are you the reason it happened.” I guess I just never learned another way to express empathy without apologizing. I feel this stems back my my childhood events concerning my parents, but I’d like to learn from it and find better ways to build the self-esteem I never had.