Dear Lost1Flow:

Thank you! “I feel it must be helping in some way being a partial caregiver than not at all though… I really wish there was some other alternative I have not thought of“-possibly, a person in a situation similar to yours, can be helping a lot more from afar: let’s say, living in another country and making enough money to send to your mother, money that can buy her more help than what you are giving her in-person. Imagine your mother managing her responsibilities on her own for a year but then being rewarded with large cash transfers. I am saying that it is possible for some people, in some situations to make this happen.

“In terms of health, my largest issue is chronic pain, which often leads to chronic fatigue due to lost sleep/insomnia. I’ve tried meditation, therapy, journaling, exercise, yoga, holistic meds, conventional meds. I really thought some of the former would also help open my mind to alternative solutions here“- I wonder if Guilt expresses itself in the form of your chronic pain, and if resolving your Guilt will also resolve some, much or all of your chronic pain.

“What processes/tools did you use to work through your personal challenges with moving and dealing with guilt? Perhaps there is something else I haven’t tried“- Guilt is so difficult to resolve that whatever you try, will not result in the disappearing of Guilt. So, you have to take the realistic, long-term approach. I am guessing that with the right approach and hard work, it will take you a couple of years to significantly lessen Guilt on a regular, continuous basis (beyond a temporary relief from guilt here and there).

If you would like, for the purpose of my understanding of your personal guilt, you can tell me what you meant by “generations of passed down guilt” (in your original post), and how your Guilt started, in what circumstances and at what age.

anita