[quote quote=434430]Hi Carol You are a very kind soul to wish that your friend is happy and ignorant. I see, so she is making an effort to visit with the other close friend but not with you? That must hurt a lot. I’m really sorry to hear that. Did you ever send that message that you wrote? If so, how did it go? If not, it might be worth discussing these things so you can get some closure. Knowing that you tried to resolve things and hearing her side of the story might bring you some peace. I guess fears either way. It has been a long friendship and endings can be painful. Does it feel like the relationship is slowly ending? Love and best wishes![/quote]

Hi,

I have replied earlier but it seems that my post is still awaiting moderation (probably because of the use of emojis?) so I am going to write it again below :

Deep down I just want her to be happy in her relationship. Sure, it would be better if it were not at my expense, but it is what I is.

Don’t worry that does not hurt that much knowing that this friend visited our city because of medical reasons. She unfortunately does not have much money, so she stayed at my friend’s place.

I haven’t sent my message yet but I am considering doing it in the following days. Sorry Anita, I know you advised against it !

I don’t know if our friendship is slowly ending or if it’s just an “ebb” from her point of view.

What I know is that I am not interested in the kind of friendship we have now, which is more casual. I am not okay with our friendship being downgraded every time she enters a relationship.

I have made some modifications and would like to send something like this :

“Hi,

There’s something I would like to talk to you about as I think it’s pretty important.

I don’t want to sound insecure, but I noticed you pulled back this year.

As a result, I also started to focus on other friendships. I notice you don’t necessarily keep me informed on what is going on into your life, so I started to do the same.

I totally understand that now that you’re in a relationship, the dynamic is different!

But I thought we would remain close.

I would like to know about your perspective ?

Also, what do you expect from me in this friendship ? ”

I don’t want to guilt-trip her not to make unnecessary accusations.

I am open to suggestions 🙂