Hi Everybody,

I’m R and I’m new in this forums. The reason why I join this forum because I want to be honest and be open with you guys. I don’t know what I have to do here. Let me start it, it happened 2 months ago when I was back to my homecountry and I met this girl from facebook, and her profile is always about her and she’s hot and gorgeous and I know I want to know about her that much and at the end you know something good might happen for both of us. when I met her, everything is so beautiful I mean we can talk and share. But the funny thing I realize that she had a boyfriend but long distance with that guy, and the funny part is we’re still seeing each other and even we can screwed around each other one day and from there seem all the LUST thing is taking control and I don’t know why but I feel so much good with this addiction but I never showed it to her that I’m addicted by her, all this time she’s the one that telling to me that she want me and she addicted to me and I just playing it safe. But one thing that I can’t understand by that time I can control myself totally and I told her we shouldn’t do this and I care about you and I like you not just from the outside but if you still have a relationship with this person why don’t you finished or settle this with him, because I don’t want to live feeling guilty by doing this ang getting more further I mean It’s nice doing this and living in the darkness but I thought at one point I can lead or guide her through my guidance because I don’t want to screw another relationship that I’m gonna have but now the long distance thing already screwed us around it’s been 3 months already from we’ve known each other. because sometimes she can contact me and sometimes she don’t give a damn about it and she told me that she’s sex maniac and a psycho. and you know it’s guy fantasy to be with a psycho girl and also a sex maniac.

please correct me if I’m wrong here but why my body wants this and even my soul feel so good about this? and lot’s of lot’s of my friends telling me that she’s a player and only keeping her option. But when I met her I felt that she’s the one, I mean I don’t know how I can feel like this, but I’m really really desperate here because I live in California and I’m all alone, and I feel like an Alien and got nobody here, even I can make a friend it feels different because I missed all the relationship that has been established in my homecountry with my friend. and now I lost my job because my probabtion is done and that company don’t want to extend my contract, and also I started act stupid by unblock all her social media and contact her again in order get someone be by myside.

but please oh God please my friend here, Help me. I’m thingking about going back to my homecountry just to see her around. I missed her and I need her. and I don’t know why I’m acting like this.