The problem is that I am really still 25 or 30 in my heart. I still want to love. travel, create art. and YES, fight for the causes that I believe in. I spent the evening with a group of ocean conservationists and regretted not studying more biology because I was a straight A biology student in high school. Bottom line is I have been poor and struggling since the nonprofit closed at the beginning of the 2008 crisis and I dedicated so much to that to end up this impoverished. When I wrote this I was burned out. Nothing seemed to mean anything anymore. So I spent time looking at pictures of the Greek sea coast and the English countryside – couldn’t renounce it. Today there hundreds of young people sitting at sidewalk cafes in DC enjoying the Summer. I thought – to renounce this is like death – why do it? Life is continuously in bloom.