Hi Bronwyn,

You sound like you’re going through the horrors, I know that hopeless feeling, I have been there myself when at 28 I found myself made redundant, with no job prospects, back living at home with my parents and then I broke my ankle, to say it was a low point was an understatement, I spent a year of this and thought i would never come through it.

I don’t know you, but from your language it’s clear you’re a sensitive soul. No one wants to hear the ‘try and be positive’ ‘chin up’ all the usual when you’re feeling low but if you just look at the facts….you say you got a useless degree from a shitty university? Well Wow you have a degree, there are so many poeople in the world who don’t have a degree, It show’s you stuck through and worked hard at something even though you didn’t believe in it, imagine what you could do if you found something you actually believed in?

You say ‘i want to work somewhere that pays me a living wage’ but yet you have been working in a coffee shop, is it not paid work?? And if you think about it you have the opportunity to gain so many skills there, it’s not just about making coffee, it’s about serving customers, being efficient, money handling, stocktaking etc and those skills could be transferred to any other job, It’s all about attitude.

Sounds like your confidence is at an all time low, you’re comparing yourself to others, you’re thinking people find you boring(and believe me I’ve been there I saw people becoming bored with me when I talked) but it’s all about regaining your confidence and everything else will fall into place. You say you’re overweight and unattractive (i’m sure that’s not true), why not do something like join a class/group(like Zumba) where you can meet people and feel good about yourself and feel attractive, and that can take the social anxiety thing out of it, just let loose.

It took me a year to sort myself out, I decided enough was enough this is my life I’m getting back on track so I volunteered to work with people with disabilities and then I saw a course in the local paper, It was paid pittance but you got training and in house experience, that’s 4 years ago now and i’m a permanent member of the organisation and love my job, goes without saying I moved out of my parents! and i took up running, the confidence has flew!

You too can get your life back on track, with a little effort and just figure out one small thing you want to do, and your self confidence will grow and all that doubt and anxiety you’re feeling will eventually go away.

Best of Luck