Everything you say sounds awesome to me. The terror and excitement is a hugely good sign. It shows how much you care about this, and just how much you are taking even yourself by surprise on some level. If it’s truly the direction you want to go in and it fills you with joy to think about doing this, then you have it. Go for it. Do everything it takes to persevere with it. When things look like they’re going badly, keep going with it. If it’s really what you want, DO IT. As for giant success or epic f-up, would you rather look back on your deathbed having tried everything you could possibly think of to achieve your dream and failed (but naturally learned LOADS in the process), or having wimped out thinking “oh what if it all goes wrong”, not knowing whether you would have succeeded or not? Which scenario fills you with more of a sense of disappointment? Also, you might keep failing and then eventually become successful. It’s not either failure or success, failures can actually be encountered on the road to eventual success. If you think of a plane, it is continually adjusting itself (correcting itself) as it gets thrown off course by turbulence, wind and it has to keep adjusting its direction because the planes don’t travel in an exact straight line. Eventually however, with a destination in mind, it reaches the destination, having spent the whole journey adjusting and adapting to whatever was happening in each moment. Be the plane. Notice your fears and act anyway. If you really want to choose this path, then things do have a way of working themselves out eventually. But even if they don’t, you won’t have died trying in the process, and who knows where your journey could take you. You may find something that isn’t being a doctor, but is even better than anything you could’ve possibly imagined in your current situation. Be daring, you only live once!