Hi Deb
Thanks for your message.
I will not initiate contact from me. I told her that my door(heart) is always open and she is always free to enter it when she wants and if she wants and on her terms.
I only love her and have never feel anything bitter in my heart towards her. I love her and set her free, and always praying for her happiness.
I do understand how you feel when you said that you are suffering from depression. Me too. I can empathize with you.
In fact, I once attempted suicide about 21 years ago (off course I will not attempt suicide again, so I know what pain is, deep deep pain.
I will pray that all goes well with you! Be strong for your family and your loved ones

Howard