Hi Maria,

Your post resonated with me so much I was prompted to register an account. I have been in a similar situation. I had an abortion at 24, at the time I wasn’t committed to my relationship and was unemployed and felt it wasn’t right to bring a child into the world without being able to even support myself.

As with your situation, your answer mainly lies with what YOU want. Your partner may not want a child, and you may face possible scrutiny from your families, but ultimately if you really don’t see yourself as a mother then it’s alright to not be one. Having children isn’t for everyone and that’s okay. I still feel the guilt and psychological effects in my life from time to time but at the end of the day, I’m not ready. And if one day you decide you want children then that’s fine, too. But if it isn’t something you feel you can really do right now, either with your partner or on your own, then the choice you make will be the best for you, and your feelings come first.

Best of luck.