Thanks Will, I do feel like I have been fixed on this one person. Recently, I have been far more open with people than I have in the past, I need to learn to connect with people more often even if it doesn’t work. For the first time in a long while, I have started making close friends I can trust and I know now it can be rewarding. You are right, this may be a teaching that I am not meant to be alone.
I try to tell myself that there are other people out there who I can love just the same. He will not be the last guy in my life. With the way he ended up in my life, I got hung up on a fantasy and I need to let go of that idea.