Dear Reena:
I read your original post and above post attentively. I tried to pay close attention to everything you wrote. Here is my input:

I read your distress, your disomfort about where the relationship is going. You are focused on the destination: him proposing to you, I assume? This is the danger I see to the relationship: your desperate need for assurance.

From what you describe I see no red flags about your boyfriend. Often in posts about bfs- gfs, there are plenty of red flags and troubling aspects but not at all in what you wrote. He seems- from your writing- like a decent, honest man, and that is HUGE. I am happy for you in this regard.

And nobody can tell the future.

If your anxiousness increases, your need to tell the future gets stronger you are going to miss the journey while focusing on the destination. Your impatience and distress over the destination needs to get under your control.

This relationship is an opportunity for you to work on personal stuff in the context of this interpersonal relationship. It will probably be a good idea if you focus on what is happening with you, what you need to do to heal yourself, to evolve as I term it, improving yourself and the relationship, focusing on the journey, not the destination. Don’t hide your vulnerability- share it (as you have) but don’t burder him with it. You are responsible for your feelings. You can ask for his help but not expect him to make all the pain go away. I hope you see my point.

I know little about you and even less about him. He is not sure about spending the rest of his life with you- or moving in with you (whatever the destination is in your mind)- he told you: “i have faith and hope that we can make it.”

Do you know what “we can MAKE IT” means- is it moving in together? Getting married? I assume “make it” is the same as your destination but you didn’t mention what your destination means. When he said he is cautious that means he has some fear of danger, the danger is breaking up, so obviously he is not sure.

I hope you see though that it is not all up to him and it is not about the destination. I read earlier today a post from 2013 about a young woman who achieved her destination, had a glorious wedding that was planned for a year and a half. The day of the wedding though she found out he cheated on her on the same day! She reached her destination but has lived in misery since, not a Happily-Ever-After story. I personally know of a woman who had a beautiful, fancy wedding- a fancy destination. But what followed a few years later is a miserable relationship. The examples are many, millions… Please do not focus on the destination. Focus on the journey and you ARE WAY MORE LIKELY TO REACH YOUR DESTINATION. Get to know yourself and him- enjoy the process.

Your impatience and distress over destination will get to him and burden him. If you try to do “all the right things” so that he will propose (the destination ?) – you will be ineffective and manipulative and not the quality, authentic woman you want to be…?

If indeed he is the quality guy he may very well be- enjoy your time with him now- be authentic. Make it about you first, navigate your own ship so to speak. I hope I am clear about what i mean???
anita