Dear mindful
So, you are saying that you really want a relationship with a man, that you very much miss teh physical intimacy and long for it every moment, then you do not have friends, not at work, you feel badly for living with your parents at 32, think you might need to change jobs and you are lost, overwhelmed.

This is a tough place to be in. It reminds me a parable I heard and I don’t remember the exact words- someone was in a jail cell and the question was: how do I become FREE? The answer was: stop wanting to get out (of the jail cell).

The parable stuck in my mind. I am in a similar situation at times, meaning, I want to do something different than I am doing. I have this TIME and I am missing something. I don’t know what that something is. What I am trying to do is not get overwhelmed or “crazy” with: Oh, I NEED to do something and NOW or else I will go crazy and: oh, how miserable I am, i must be depressed, maybe I should go on some medication…

Instead I BREATHE and keep my brain calm, as calm as I can keep it. “This is it,” I say to myself. “This is my situation.” I relax into it, accept it, that is without judging it, without catastrophizing it, without making it more or other than it really is.

Any constructive thoughts about the “how, what and where” you are looking for will come only from that calm, accepting place anyway, so there is only benefit and no disadvantage to accepting it, relaxing into what is, as it is now.

anita