Dear pikachumew2:

There is much value in that your father did not and does not abuse you and your brother, that he has often been kind to you and honest as well: much value in that and I like him for that, so I can understand you liking him for the same things. He does understand being rejected and abused in his own childhood and by his own wife, and he didn’t go on to take it out on you. He didn’t turn from abused to abusive and in so, he is a good role model for you and for your brother.

it would have been better of course, if he was able to remove you and your brother from your mother- but that is legally impossible unless the mother is blatantly abusive, that is bone breaking or so. He would need physical documentations and hospital record and lots of legal maneuvering and money to do all that.

Sure, it would have been best if he was careful to begin with about who he married.

Could have/ would have- and there reality is what it is. As to your question, my answer is: no, your dad is not a horrible father. In the situation you are in, you and your brother being minor, without blatant horribly visible abuse by your mother, there really is nothing he can do.

anita