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Thank you again for your reply.
My wife has come from a different life than mine which probably was an attraction. She is very humble. She likes the simple things In life. So my inherent search for perfection doesn’t fit with her thinking.
I would love to talk to her but she is already stressed with family life and work.
Unfortunately I wish I was more active in helping her with looking after our young babies. She does the feeding, changing everything. I occasionally help when she asks me too. But I feel lazy and not proactive. The babies still yearn for the mother as they spend more time together. This will change as they get older.
I want her to be happy and i sometimes feel her lack of happiness is my fault. She left her family to come live with me. She works with me and work is a mess. My mother lives near us. All these things are from my side and which I introduced into her life. All these things are bringing her anxiety.