Dear ridedhood:

So what made your mother very angry when she found his number in your calling history is her projection of her anger at herself for marrying your father long ago. She is very attached to her life story and projects from it what your life story should be. Her view is limited to her story and that is why she cannot see your point of view at all, as you wrote. So communication with her is very limited to her point of view. I am sure you tried to present your point of view but she rejected it again and again, being too attached to her own emotions, inaccurately projecting them to you.

Please keep this in mind as you evaluate her opinions and what she thinks you should do with your life. I believe that over time your depression will lift as you make your own choices, independent of your mother’s inaccurate projections.

Of course, some of her projections are correct. Of course, there is value to income production in the future. So I hope you can peel of what is inaccurate in her projections from what is accurate. I say: everyone is wrong some times and no one is wrong all the time, even a broken clock is correct every 24 hours.

In your to be first relationship, I hope you get your chance to have your developing points of view accepted, considered, valued by a man who has his own, and let you have your own, and then work together on a common goal, as a team.

Please do post anytime…
anita