@seekingsatisfaction: Thought I’d give you both this update. Me and my girlfriend spoke and I’ve told her how I’ve used this site to help me 🙂 although you’ve made me see more sense to her actions I told her I’m finding it extremely hard to get over her hurting me. I’ve realised I’m more scared of her now than ever.. That whenever she speaks about another guy I get worried about the words that’ll come out her mouth. I also told her that committing to her and us for a long-term relationship is really hard for me to do whilst I feel like this. I feel more at ease whilst she’s tearing herself apart. I told her maybe in time when we’ll get back to how we used to be but for now, I’m much happier just with myself at the moment.

@newlife123: hello again 🙂 sorry I should’ve been clearer – she never argued back, it was always me and that’s the truth. She’d always accept and regret her mistakes.. It’d be more me continuously bringing it back up again. The first guy she used to get me jealous – anytime we’d mention or he’d fall into conversation, I’d get nervy and from there, pick up anything she’d say to suggest she liked him. I guess what she said always stuck with me and made me think that she’d always wanted him and I was second choice. It’s only recently she told me she’d only used him to make me jealous and I know now that’s not true and I’m working to erase him from my head.

I may be naive or pushing things to the side because of how much I like her and the plans I had for us but what I said about her is true. She is naive and she’s never had no one before me.. If you read what I said about her being a Muslim girl and putting her values at risk for me. But that she’s innocent and doesn’t like/appreciate another guys attention is something I question more now I guess or how easy she’ll start liking another guys company – she never used to feel the need to speak or get friendly when I used to work with her but that all changed when I left. She’d told me that was her just trying to be normal and get over missing me not being around as much. When I say naive I mean she doesn’t know how to act or deal with situations as she’s not used to them. She says having a boyfriend is new to her so she didn’t know the boundaries I’d expect.. But surely these are obvious ones? I’ve made mistakes with my first girlfriends in the past too and they’ve forgiven me.. Why can’t I do the same?

I wouldn’t.. But talking to you, laying out what’s actually happened in my relationship makes me realise that she’s hurt me and how much it actually bothers me.

I’m okay and even with my update I hope you keep posting back – it feels good being able to have someone to help me unravel my feelings.

Thank you, Adam