Dear Ann87:

Yes, you need time to heal. I believe the situation is that you have low self esteem AND you are in a bad relationship. Both.

I don’t like your boyfriend, from your descriptions. He may be better than your boyfriend before him (you compared in the post above) but this is still bad. May be worse, but it is still bad.

You need to be seen, to be heard. You have that right, inherent right… human right.

You were injured by your original family, your parents not being available to you. The patterns were set then.

I think it would be a great idea, if possible, for your parents to pay for good psychotherapy for you, since your relationships with them is good now! They are responsible for the injury they caused you and the consequences of that injury from which you are suffering now. It is only right that they will pay for psychotherapy for you. Your last sentence is “I need some time to heal”- I would add: time and professional help, a competent, caring, hard working and dedicated psychotherapist!

Post again, anytime.

anita