Dear Sparkie:

You wrote: “there was a nagging feeling from around the age of 5 that something wasn’t right.” Then you found out at 11 that your father was not your biological father. It seems to me that you locked into this fact as what “wasn’t right.”

You also remember your uncle touching you in a sexual way when you were 4 and although this was definitely wrong in any and every sense of wrong, it was not all that was wrong in your childhood, far from it.

The fact that you didn’t tell your mother or father about the sexual touching for fear you will be called a liar and not believed means to me that you were not believed previously and outside the molestation, that you were already called a liar or such was communicated to you. You feared to not be believed because you were already not believed, not validated, and alone.

Am I correct? Partly correct? Please let me know.

anita