Dear kaymarie:

My advice: don’t forget your children at this time. Continue to create for them the safe, calm environment that a home should be for children. Give them the attention and love that they need during this difficult time. It may be a good idea for both you and your husband, together, to spend more quality time with your three children at this time. This will be good for them and strengthen the family bond for you and your husband: mom-dad-kids.

Be available to talk with your husband as much as he needs to and as much as you need to: talk and talk, honestly, openly, each taking responsibility for your own individual feelings as you continue to take full responsibility for the extramarital affair. At times, he will need alone time, no talking, to let things settle in his brain. Give him that time. At times, you will need time alone, give yourself this time, letting him know the purpose of such time.

Go out with your husband for outdoor relaxing activities, be it walking in the park on a sunny day, nature. Long walks and such.

And do post here again and again with your feelings, thoughts, and how this healing period (I hope) unfolds.

anita