Baby,

I can understand why you would feel like that, and I wonder about this thing you call trust. For instance, we would not trust a snake not to bite us, but we would trust it to act like a snake. Perhaps there is a false assumption that his actions are random, but its highly unlikely. The same patterns that trap you into mistrust trap him… but if working with his patterns and helping him isn’t your aim, what are you looking for? Validation that it is just to give up? Coping mechanisms to heal your own tender heart from the disgust?

Perhaps it isn’t morality the child needs, but better food for whatever lack that is driving his hunger, his dysfunction. Disgust is such an odd and painful emotion, usually arising when we forget that the people who are acting poorly have been taught to act that way by circumstance. Much like a flower doesn’t bloom if there is not rain, sun, and a seed, dysfunction doesn’t arise without the conditions that support it. Who’s to blame?

With warmth,
Matt