Good morning, My name is Ashley I’m 30 years old. For the last two years I was in a relationship with a man for almost 2 and half years with bipolar 1 low depression rapid cycling mania. In those two years I was belittled on a daily basis, mentally manipulated, he would lock doors so I could not leave, hide my keys so I could not leave, and I was forced to do work that I was not paid to do. I was only allowed to see my family on his terms. He would only let me work my regular job when it suited him. By keeping me broke he kept control over me. You may ask yourself, How did you let yourself get into such an abusive situation? It wasn’t immediate. When I met him I was independent, happy and single. I had a full time job and I had my own life. But then after meeting him on an online dating site I gradually regressed into a poor version of myself.
I’m messed up from the abuse. Super high anxiety and low sense of self worth. I want to date eventually but I’m afraid to start because I feel like I don’t measure up to other women my age. Its only been a month since the break up. His hateful words are still lingering in my ears, and I have horrifying dreams about the things he used to do to me. Besides the general advice I tend to get (meditation, exercise, therapy) what can I do to heal from the pain this situation has caused me? Thank you.