Home→Forums→Relationships→Is there a chance for us after a bad breakup?
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February 7, 2017 at 5:48 pm #126990lexyParticipant
im 22 and hes 23. Me and my bf have been together almost a year. We became long distance for 5 months but closed it off and moved in together for two months but he had to move to a diff city an hour away for work temporarily. We had a great relationship and i know that he loved me so much but like other relatinships, we had fights and times we almost broke up but when i tried to break it off he would call me crying and begging and i did same. we didnt wanna break up we both know that. He would always tell me that he didnt wanna lose me and he said to be with me is a life plan he already decided. He also alwasy tells me im his type as a wife n the future. We had many future plans. We were gonna move in again in two months. Now, we argued a day before he broke up but the next day we were happy again. at night he texted saying i never changed even he gave me many chances. When we argue i would get mad when he reacts angrily and even i just wanna talk when we fight. He hates it. I begged him not to leave and saying that we were getting better but he blocked my facebook and other Social media. He deleted all our pictures and told our mutual friend its impossible to continue this relationship. However, he has two instagram accounts an i know the password for the other one and i opened it to unblock myself and send messages. He keeps dleting and blocking and i would unblock and send again. That night he sent me a message a final message.
He said hes sorry he cant accept my personality and he appreciate everything. And he tried and waited the entire relationship for me to change but i didnt. That was the last message and i still keep messaging him but he also blocked my number. I made a fake account to message him again. I know. Bad move. The next day, I tried to open his Instagram but He deleted his account. Im so confused cause that acccount hes been using since 2011 and basically had all his memories. He could have just changed password and blocked me but why did he delete? He cut off all contacts and i sent a final message using the fake account that he didnt block saying i wanna be mature about the breakup and apologized for being emotional about it. He didnt read it and i assume he deleted it. he never contacted me since he broke it off. I started the No contact rule Its been a week since we broke up. When we fought before we would speak immediately and lonest time not speaking i think is 3 days. Other than the small arguments we have, I think our relationship is great and our sex life is great. Hes close to my family and we are best friends and like family. WEre both very comfortable with each other and im the only person he cried in front of or call crying when hes feeling insecure cause he has a high pride but he showed me everything and he told me im the only person he ever showed his real self (aside from family) I want him back and i am confident we can make out relationship workSO MY QUESTIONS:
1. why did he delete it instead of just changing password?
2. should i keep waiting for him to contact me first?
3. What if he nver contacts me again?
4. Next week is valentines day and also our anniversary can i contact him?
5. he seems to not care at all cause he did not even give a closure or talk to me properly. What could possibly be the reason for that?Please give me advice other than my questions,
Now im doing the NC and working to improve myself. Thanks in advanceFebruary 8, 2017 at 4:27 am #127002TeddyParticipantMost of the time it is good to seek advice because people, friends and family tend to see clearly about a relationship than those in it.
Here is my piece
He deleted you maybe because he still angry and just need space
2. Give him time and then maybe contact him
3. You contact him
4. It is still fresh. Valentine or not. Give him space. Dont contact him. You both need time to think alot of things out.
5. He might be really angry about alot of things. (built up pain and annoyance).February 8, 2017 at 5:37 am #127011AnonymousGuestDear lexylexy07:
1. why did he delete it instead of just changing password?- I don’t know, but either case, it means he did not want you to contact him.
2. should i keep waiting for him to contact me first?- it is better that you wait for him to contact you than that you try to contact him first; but better than you waiting is you giving up on contacting him altogether because he made it very clear that he doesn’t want you to contact him, and you should respect his assertion.
3. What if he never contacts me again?- live your life without him. Make your next relationship with a man a healthier relationship where there are no fights, no begging, no reuniting and then fighting and breaking up again. Instead of all that drama, all that war- make that next relationship be about love and peace.
4. Next week is valentines day and also our anniversary can i contact him?- no, because he made it very clear that he doesn’t want to have any contact with you. Respect his wish, his choice, his assertion. Respect him- it is his right to make the choice he has made.
5. he seems to not care at all cause he did not even give a closure or talk to me properly. What could possibly be the reason for that?- a possible reason is that he is tired of all the drama, the fighting, the begging, the getting back together and breaking up. Maybe he realizes the truth: that fighting is not a necessary part of a relationship, and that a loving and peaceful relationship is better, way, way better. Don’t you?
anita
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