My story started about a little less than three years ago. That year started out by a break up of a 7 year relationship that i did not see coming. That year was the hardest i think i have ever lived through. Besides being devastated from the break up, i lost a good friend that year, my grandfather developed cancer and passed away very quickly, and to top it off i watched my dog get hit by a car (luckily with surgery she is still with me today). With in that year I took up paddle boarding, i took many yoga classes, i made it a hobby to go to the beach in the morning and in the evening to take pictures of the sunrise or sunset. In the passed three years i have been on many dates and have gotten to know a few good people some have remained friends and others i do not talk to. All of the relationships i have been in have had some sort of flaw or block that has had the relationship not work. Being it was that they thought i lived to far away for them, I worked too much, One GF went into depression because she blamed herself for killing her dog, one person didn’t tell me that they were terrified of dogs until after a few dates. when I said i would be there for her if she wanted to over come her fear. What i got in return was “Don’t get too attached to them, they don’t last that long”. My latest attempt of trying to find love was with a former coworker. I connected with her when she had been gone for a while through a dating site just by chance. We dated a few times to find out she was going to be coming back to where i work again. So she broke it off. When she started again we connected and have wanted to date each other but cant because of management would not like it. I somehow find myself finding people who are not for me and it has taken a toll on me. I want to so badly keep looking and dating but at the same time i am tired of putting myself out there only to be let down or hurt. I go to the exercise regularly, I eat health and organic, I have signed up to adopt a road by me, and i enter into paddle boarding charitable fundrasiers/races. I have read through a good amount of blogs here and have taken in what was written, if applies. I just dont know how to change/adjust my mindset to be a better happier person. It just seem like im always getting knocked down.