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Long Distance Issues and Breakup

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  • #200319
    Eve
    Participant

    anita,

    He was drunk and upset and there was yelling but I needed space not because he was aggressive (which he usually wasn’t, until that last conversation) but because I was unsure of what I wanted anymore and to find the reason as to why I wasn’t happy anymore. Before I moved home, I had gone through a bad friendship breakup, I was ghosted by my close knit group of friends right after this bad injury and I was emotionally unstable and he was there for me through it all. But since then, I have changed a lot, Ive grown more confident and willing to speak my mind, and I think we didn’t have the chance to change and grow together and it felt like I was still that person when we’d speak, I was unsure of who I was and what I wanted when the breakup happened because life’s been a rollercoaster of experience for me lately.

    But regarding how I had been there for him, I now realize that I could’ve handled situations like those better and been more supportive, even though I thought I was. This will be something I’ll be more conscious of in the future, and apologize when I get that chance. Thank you for bringing this to light, I always try to be my best self but it helps when someone helps light the way.

    Eve

    #200327
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Eve:

    You are welcome. It seems to me that you are not clear as to what happens, and therefore I am not  clear either. Pay better attention, in the future. If you are in a conversation with a person and you get confused, distressed, better end the conversation and communicate later, when you are calm. In distress there is a blur, a fog, and the greater the distress, the thicker the fog.

    Understandably, following a serious injury, the inability to walk, I assume, not to mention the inability to dance, was very distressing to you. And there is another surgery and more recovery to come. Maybe a short term psychotherapy will help, to deal with all this distress.

    anita

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