Hi,

I recently started dating someone. All was really nice and then, bam…haven’t seen him for a month…he still talks to me all the time….has asked to see me multiple times but has not follow through, and now is getting increasingly flaky. Last thing that happened was I asked him to let me know by tomorrow night if we could get together on the date i preferred and he said “I will!!!” and then texted 2 more times with other dates we could meet instead. That was last night and he hasn’t texted me as he said he would.

I have had this happen in the past with men. Pretty much the exact same scenario. All men (including this new one) I never slept with prior to this happening…we did do other “things” however. In the past I responded negatively and created distance when this behavior occurred. All of these men came back to me months or years later, said sorry and some said they wanted a relationship now, while others said they wish they didn’t act the way they did and regretted us becoming distant…one even told me he’s really proud of me as well.

My current situation with the man mentioned in the first small paragraph is diffenent soley because I am conscious that confronting him is not the solution and I am instead backing off without saying anything, choosing myself and not taking it personally.

But I have to ask. Why do men do this with me? I mean, I really don’t get it. Am I choosing men who are afraid of emotions? Do they not like me? Is this completely normal and I am not accepting this is a phase of dating? I just get so confused why this happens all the time.

I have guy friends (who I will not date) who want to marry me. I am just lost why this happens with all the men I date.

What could be the cause of all these men behaving the same way?

Many thanks,
S