A few months ago I posted here about someone I was involved with for a brief time and was very confused by his reasoning for leaving… This is the link to the post to give the history of the situation: http://tinybuddha.com/topic/should-i-reach-out-to-him/

It has been about three months since that day we met up to talk and although I am glad we did, I am still struggling deep down. Seeing him almost every day at work can either be tolerable or excruciatingly painful. I cannot shake him from my heart or my mind. Some days I can go for a long while without thinking about him, but then there are days where he does not leave my thoughts for a second. There are reminders everywhere I go because he and I had shared everything in common together. On our last day of working before summer break, I wanted to wish him safe travels before leaving, but I didn’t. I wanted to reach out, to see how he was doing but I’ve been fighting with myself as to whether I should just keep my distance or not. This past month, he was away in another country and I also took a ten day trip to Iceland with my best friend. During my time there, it was less frequent that I thought of him, but there was always this feeling inside of me that he was missing. Tomorrow we return to work, and will be seeing each other for the first time since the end of July. I feel foolish for feeling excited to see him, but I also am dreading how that first hello and small talk will play out. I guess I still miss him dearly, and if he were to come back, I would give a second chance because I believe everyone deserves it. But perhaps I am relying too much on false hope that he will come back. My mind and my heart are constantly in opposition as to what I should do. It has been difficult to talk with family and friends over this because they all think I should be over this by now, and tell me he doesn’t deserve me. To hear this hurts me though, because I know he did not do what he did intentionally. I guess I would be lying if I said I was over him, and I just feel lost still. Any kind of response to this would be greatly welcomed and appreciated.