“The future is completely open, and we are writing it moment to moment.” -Pema Chodron
A while back, a reader commented that it’s easy for me to suggest tomorrow is full of possibilities, since I am relatively young. An older woman, she believed her options were far more limited, and that even if she could do the things she wanted to do, they wouldn’t count–not at her age.
My first instinct was to start a conversation about mindfulness, since no one is ever guaranteed more than the present. Even young people don’t know for certain that they have decades more to live, so all we can ever really do is use this moment well.
But then I thought about her comment about the future not counting.
I interpreted this to mean she couldn’t enjoy the rest of her days because she felt they would somehow be defined by the “wasted” ones that had passed–like a smile wouldn’t be as joyful as it could be because there were fewer than she wanted before it, or helping someone wouldn’t be as meaningful as it could be because it wouldn’t contribute to a lifelong legacy.
It seemed like she felt that life had passed her by, even though it was still going. I could relate to that feeling. I’ve wasted many days worrying about the days I thought I wasted. It’s a vicious cycle, and it only stops when we decide to use the present to the best of our ability.
If we worry about everything we wish we did, or could do with our lives, we will miss out on the opportunity to really live them–right here and right now. Regardless of our age, we all have two things in common: we get to decide whether or not we think this moment matters; and we get to decide what exactly it means to make it count.
The present is completely open, and we are living it, right now. What do you want to make of it?
Photo by Two Roses
About Lori Deschene
Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha. She started the site after struggling with depression, bulimia, c-PTSD, and toxic shame so she could recycle her former pain into something useful and inspire others do the same. She recently created the Breaking Barriers to Self-Care eCourse to help people overcome internal blocks to meeting their needs—so they can feel their best, be their best, and live their best possible life. If you’re ready to start thriving instead of merely surviving, you can learn more and get instant access here.
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