I did some reading over the weekend and I think I have found what I am searching for. The last 2 years I have had severe anxiety due to a very stressful time with my extended family. I had to walk away from my siblings that hurt me and my own family, it was tough but it has brought me so much peace and happiness. That sounds wrong but the stress and violent behavior led to me suffering from severe anxiety and panic attacks for 2 years. I posted on Tough Times a year ago. I am now in a much better place and I have focused on mindfulness and ypga which has brought me so much happiness and peace. It has led me to thinking Buddhism really might something I want to practice. During my 2 years I kept thinking I should go to church and pray to God as I thought maybe that would help me through the horrific time i was going through. I believe there is a God but I wouldn’t say I am comforted by thinking God will protect me and help me if I pray to him, if that makes sense. So I do have beliefs but I was never brought up to go to church.

I am thinking Buddhism is the way for me and I was wondering if anyone could point me in the right direction where I can learn more about it, Maybe some books or good websites. I have done some reading and it made me think wow this really could be what I need. I do my ypga and mindfulness but feel I want something else in my life, but I don’t feel church is it.

I hope this all makes sense. I found it hard to get across how I feel.

Ju