Dear Niyata:

Your last sentence was that you don’t know what is going to happen in connection with the man. He lives in the US, you live in India. Your connection is an online connection for as long as you live in separate continents. You don’t see him getting a divorce, nor do you want him to and he did not express such motivation to get divorced.

So when you state you don’t know what is going to happen, it seems to me that nothing is going to happen.

It seems to me that nothing much is happening outside of your mental experience of it, outside of what you are thinking and feeling about it.

Your online relationship with this man is not The Problem. You are focused on it, and that is the problem. I wish your focus would be elsewhere, on your life, on your in person relationships in your life, in India where you live. I wish your focus would be on your daily life, what you are actually doing, how you are doing what you are doing and how you interact and with whom you interact in your daily in-person life.

I believe your way out of your confusion is to focus on your in-person daily life as is. The online communication with this man is like an addiction to an online game, a distraction taking you away from the real problems.

anita