Dear idonno:

I didn’t know about the financial aspect. I hope you do follow through with the financial consequences aspect. It sounds only fair to me.

I imagined she was afraid of your anger because of a quote you had in one of the post. The real, big picture- I can only guess at, bring up possibilities, ask questions. Obviously you yourself are not sure what motivates her, except you know that honesty is not something she is practicing. I only hope you are practicing it, and as you do, evaluate her honesty or lack of.

It would be a good idea if you could empty your brain from all assumptions, all wishful thinking and see the minimum of things as they are.

The behavior you described on her part, early on, strongly suggests to me that she does not feel the desire to be intimate with you on any level, emotional, physical. If your description of her behavior is accurate, I don’t see any other way to interpret it than what I just stated.

Beyond that, there are calculations and lots of manipulations on her part before she says what she says to you. You have a veil of deceit that makes your vision unclear.

I thought if you no longer tell her how much she hurts you, if you lay off any emotional pressure, maybe she will relax and tell you the truth, a Maybe. I thought maybe her fear of your anger and/ or guilt, like you believe are keeping her from being honest with you.

anita